1) “If it’s me and your granny on bongos, then it’s the Fall.”

2) “I like to push people till I get the truth out of them. Get them drunk, or whatever. Then discover what they really think. Push them and push them and push them.”

3)”I said, “Shut them cunts up!” And they were still warming up, so I threw a bottle at them. The bands said, “That’s the Sons of Mumford’ or something. “They’re No. 5 in [the] charts!” I just thought they were a load of retarded Irish folk singers.”

4) “I used to be psychic, but I drank my way out of it.”

5)“A lot of musicians are really hard to deal with. They aren’t as smart as me.”

6) “It’s just like music when you reckon it up. It’s like, listening to Pavement, it’s just the Fall in 1985, isn’t it? They haven’t got an original idea in their heads.”

7)”Blue cheese contains natural amphetamines. Why are students not informed about this?”

8) “Every day is great for me. I dislike rose-coloured glasses.”

9)”When I was 14, I used to have a calendar on my wall, crossing the days off until I was 15, because the school leaving age was 15. Then three months before I turned 15 they changed the leaving age to 16.”

10)”The thing with me. I can’t stick musicians. I’ve thought about this. I can’t stand them, and being stuck in a studio with them I think that’s my strength I can hear what they can’t.”